Why I love scathing movie reviews

So Paris Hilton apparently has a new movie coming out called, "The Hottie and the Nottie" and, shockingly, it sounds perfectly awful.

I've read four reviews and none have been at all kind. But, I think my favorite is by the Boston Globe's Ty Burr, who wrote a review for today's paper. I've always loved Burr's writing style, especially when he hates a movie and he really didn't like Hilton's latest offering. The highlights include:

The problem with "The Hottie and the Nottie" is - wait, let me start again. The most crippling of the many problems afflicting "The Hottie and the Nottie" is the radical disconnect between the title and our perception of the movie's star. I'm not sure on what planet Paris Hilton is considered "hot" - one that involves hazmat suits and tongs, possibly - but it hasn't been Earth for some time.

Then there's Hilton. She delivers her lines in an unmodulated near-whisper and keeps her head lowered, gazing up at Nate as if she'd learned Acting Position #1 and then dropped the class. The film poses her in a succession of bikinis, mini-tops, and short shorts, none of which give her the presence necessary to actually hold the screen. Her head seems too small for her body and stuck on at an odd angle. She resembles nothing so much as a tiny blond velociraptor.

No question where Burr stands on this one!

Britney ... Britney ... Britney

Just saw this story about Britney Spears being committed to a psych ward.

Being a dad really changed my perspective on this story.

When all of this started, I really couldn't have cared less. I thought, "Pffft, Britney Spears. She's rich, poor thing ... she has problems. Don't we all."

But, as this has played out over the past few months to a year, I've come to realize that this woman really is sick and needs help. The article says she may be bipolar ... she could be still suffering from postpartum depression, too. Every time I read something about Spears, I just keep thinking about her kids. I mean, c'mon, for better or worse she is a mom and I think it speaks to the level of her mental illness when she just can't seem to get it together enough when she's threatened with losing custody of her children (the article says she hasn't seen her kids in almost a month).

Here's hoping she gets the help she needs so she can get her life back on track. That and once she does, may be we won't have to hear about this crap anymore. Seriously ... we're in a recession or about to enter one (depending on who you believe), there's a war going on, healthcare is still a major crisis in this country and Spears and her shenanigans still make headlines?!? Oy vey ...

That all being said, I won't lose any sleep over this. If no one ever hears about Spears again it'll be too soon.