Top 10 things ...

I love about my wife, Kelley (in no particular order):

1. The way she laughs like Betty Rubble when I kiss her neck.
   
2. Her eyes.
   
3. The look on her face when she's holding our 3 1/2-year-old son.
   
4. The way she'll just listen when I spout off over something that's not worth getting upset over.
   
5. The way she smells after being in her clothes all day ... it's like this warm, soft kind of scent.
   
6. Her sense of humor and the way she cracks herself up.
   
7. The fact that she's a voracious reader. It amazes me how fast she can read and retain it all.
   
8. How passionate she is in her beliefs. She's all about equal rights for everyone and she doesn't see color or sexual or religious orientation when she meets someone. She takes people for who they are and isn't a judgmental person.
   
9. Her love of a good drink ... gin and tonics in the summer ... martinis, well, year 'round, actually.
   
10. The way she calls me "Crash" with that smile on her face.
    
11. (OK, so it's 11 things ...) How what you see is what you get. She doesn't try to be someone she's not and if you don't like it, it's your loss.
    
12. (OK, OK, it's 12, then!) She loves me.

Prom night

Kell's high school (well, it's not her high school, it's the one at which she is a teacher ... I digress) held their prom last weekend and I went along as a chaperone because it was a free date night and it was good to see some of the people she works with.

Anyway, it was at the prom that I came to a disconcerting realization ... I'm old.

I base this epiphany on a few observations:

• It never ceases to amaze how many girls (and they are girls, not women) go for the slutty look. Just astounding that their parents would let them leave the house like that.
  
• Apparently, the new(?) thing is for guys to wear new baseball caps as formal wear. There were a few kids there wearing caps with the flat brim, slightly askew. Now, this was bad enough, but what was even worse was the fact that they didn't take off the caps when they sat down to dinner. Drove me absolutely insane.
  
• Seeing kids practically fornicating in dark corners of the hall was ridiculous. But Kell had fun going after them, so that was fun to watch.
  
• Aside from the few teachers' requests that the DJ played, I didn't recognize a single song I heard. They all sounded the same ... bumpa bumpa bumpa ... thumpa thumpa thumpa ... crapola crapola crapola. Ye gods.

But, all that being said, I had to give credit to the few kids who go for that goth/Marilyn Manson-type look. It may be really bizarre to me, but you have to admit that these kids really don't care about conforming to the norm. They really have a unique style ... hmmm, I guess in their own way they're conforming to others like them, but it certainly isn't mainstream.

Anyway, this is a different generation to be sure and never is it more evident than when attending a high school event.

"I'm a kid, mama!"

A recent exchange between Kell and Joey:

Kell: Hey munchkin, what are you up to?

Joey: (looking up from his teddy bear) Hi Mama, I'm Doctor Joey and I'm making sure I'm teddy bear is OK.

Kell: Really? You're Doctor Joey? Cool!

(As she says this, she walks through a doorway and bumps her elbow on the door frame.)

Kell: Ow ow ow!

Joey: Are you OK, Mama?

Kell: Yeah, Mama's OK, I just got a boo-boo on my elbow. Do you want to look at it and make it better, Doctor Joey?

Joey: Mama! I'm not a doctor, I'm a kid!